What's Worse Than a Fish with a Human Face? This.




That cannot be real. Evolution did not spawn a creature with a fucking yellow smiley face on its back. Science is lying to us.

This is Theridion grallatora, a.k.a. the Happy Face Spider, a.k.a. a sick joke somebody is playing on the world's spider experts. Some think the terrifying cartoon face somehow evolved to ward off predators, presumably by convincing them that instead of seeing a spider, they're merely having a bad acid trip. Best to abandon dinner and go lie down for a bit.